Would You Like Another Meeting Or a Cup Of Tea Instead?

With apologies to The King’s Breakfast by A.A. Milne

by Peter Trolove

An angler went a fishing, his day became a frown

With plants and toxic algae up and water levels down

In his search for missing fish as the rivers turned to slime

His thoughts became more urgent, “we are running out of time”.

An Auckland money changer keyed by politics of greed

Simply changed the water rules to take all that he would need

With money as his focus as with many of his ilk

“There is money to be made boys turning water into milk”

Now no one owns the water a comment Key would make

So he gave it to his farming friends using money from the State

Key replaced Ecan’s councillors with commissioners of his own

Who employed the water users to run the Water Zones

“Consultation” “Aspiration” were the words that Ecan used

Elaborate propaganda kept the ratepayers bemused

By setting distant time lines there was never any doubt

The Council could procrastinate before they were found out

The angler made of sterner stuff surveyed the damage he could see

Much of it attributed to nitrate from cow pee

He measured polluted rivers taking care and taking time

Nitrate in the Selwyn River reached four times the “bottom line”

He reported this to Ecan, to a member of the staff

His protest went unanswered but might have raised a laugh

He reported to the Council but the results were much the same

A circular discussion as to who was NOT to blame

The evidence was tabled once accepted all agreed

Situation unacceptable for action there is need

So thank you for your evidence you really are well read

Now would you like another meeting or a cup of tea instead?

Cartoonists have highlighted the ruining of rivers with intensive farming, now poets are wading in on the argument

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3 Responses to Would You Like Another Meeting Or a Cup Of Tea Instead?

  1. Thaddeus O'Flynn says:

    Delightfully written Peter.
    Many a true word is said in jest. It epitomises paralyisis by committee (“another meeting or a cup of tea”) and the inaction. Meanwhile the contamination and extraction of water continues.

  2. Bridget Yeats says:

    Well said! Keep on with your advocacy for a change in focus – other ways of making a dollar without destroying the life streams! Bureaucrats and politicians talk and talk but positive action is needed not more appeasement talk, token consultation etc…

  3. Tim Neville says:

    I love this one. It says (a) NZFFA has a talented President, and (b) his regional council is looking like a paper tiger. The situation is quite sad. Pleasing dairy farmers is still the day-to-day priority of ECan staff.
    Tim Neville

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